Sadly, Rick Is So Not Famous Now That He Qualifies As A Stranger

“Every man’s an actor, every girl is pretty.”

Don't Talk To Strangers, by Rick Springfield

Stop Your Complaining!

“Nobody said it was easy; no one ever said it would be this hard.”

The Scientist, by Coldplay

Sounds Like You've Got Women Issues, Dude

“Give me back my point of view ‘cause I just can’t think for you; I can hardly hear you say, ‘What should I do?’”

Look What You've Done, by Jet

Blame Mark David Chapman

“Ever since you’ve been leaving me, I’ve been wanting to cry.”

Too Late For Goodbyes, by Julian Lennon

No, Michael, Molesting Little Boys Is NOT Human Nature

“If this town is just an apple, then let me take a bite.”

Human Nature, by Michael Jackson

Well, This Explains That Symbol Name...

“I’ll write a letter when I learn how to spell.”

Guitar, by Prince

Shut Up Before I Give You Something To Cry About

“They only hit until you cry; after that you don’t ask why--you just don’t argue anymore.”

Luka, by Suzanne Vega

At The Very Least, Wash The Stank Away From You

“I sense it now: the water’s getting deep; I try to wash the pain away from me.”

Everywhere, by Michelle Branch

The Claps In This Song Prove How Essential John Oates Was

“What my head overlooks, the senses will show to my heart.”

Private Eyes, by Hall & Oates

Why Does Every Drunk Person Know The Words To This Song?

“Good times never seemed so good.”

Sweet Caroline, by Neil Diamond

Unfortunately, I've Also Got Cat Scratch Fever

“I wish I could be as carefree and wild, but I got cat class and I got cat style.”

Stray Cat Strut, by The Stray Cats

That Sounds Like A Fantasy To Me

“I tend to dream you when I’m not sleeping.”

I'd Die Without You, by P.M. Dawn

That's Because Your Mind Is Too Weird, Prince

“You’d be better off cheatin’ than tryin’ to read my mind.”

Love 2 The 9's, by Prince

I'd Like To See You Naked, But We Don't Always Get What We Want

“I’d like to see us as good of friends as we used to be.”

You're In Love, by Wilson Phillips

Personally, I'd Rather Just Sleep In

“And I want to wake up with the rain falling on a tin roof while I’m safe there in your arms.”

Come Away With Me, by Norah Jones

Really, I'm Probably More Addicted To Sex

“You like to think that you’re immune to the stuff, oh yeah--it’s closer to the truth to say you can’t get enough.”

Addicted To Love, by Robert Palmer

Could He Be Leaving On The Midnight Train To Georgia?

“Just a city boy, born and raised in south Detroit--he took the midnight train going anywhere.”

Don't Stop Believin', by Journey

I Think You Would Need To Stop Drinking

“If I could fall into the sky, do you think time would pass me by?”

A Thousand Miles, by Vanessa Carlton

Goddamn Hippie Witch

“The clouds never expect it when it rains.”

Edge Of Seventeen, by Stevie Nicks

Said The Man With More Money Than God

“Isn’t that a shame that sometimes money buys you everything and nothing?”

Condition Of The Heart, by Prince

What The Hell?

“I got a Dalmatian and I can still get high.”

What I Got, by Sublime

Spice Girls: Homophobes Or Just Representing Family Values?

“Boys and girls feel good together.”

2 Become 1, by The Spice Girls

Trust Me, Things Can Always Get Worse

“Do you feel scared? I do--but I won’t stop and falter.”

Things Can Only Get Better, by Howard Jones

Well, I Was Gonna Stop But You've Guilted Me Into Continuing Now...

“I don’t know how you keep on giving.”

Kind And Generous, by Natalie Merchant

Actually, Sounds Like You Have A Social Anxiety Disorder

“I’ve done no harm; I keep to myself--there’s nothing wrong with my state of mental health.”

Who Can It Be Now?, by Men At Work

Don't Wait Too Long--That's What Got You Busted The First Time

“I need someone to hold me, but I’ll wait for something more.”

Faith, by George Michael

Do You Think This Line Works On Blind Chicks?

“If God one day struck me blind, your beauty I’d still see.”

Adore, by Prince

So, LL's A Cross-Dresser?

“A Fendi bag and a bad attitude--that’s all I need to get me in a good mood.”

Around The Way Girl, by LL Cool J

That's My Ex-Wife, In A Nutshell

“She’s got a gold tooth--you know she’s hardcore; she’ll show you a good time, then she’ll show you the door.”

Hey Ladies, by The Beastie Boys

That's Just Gross, Honey

“I wake up--I’ve been sleeping in somebody’s shoes.”



Strangest Places, by Abra Moore

Try Telling That To Sports Fans, John--Then Tell Them About Your Pink House

“There’s winners and there’s losers--they ain’t no big deal.”

Pink Houses, by John Cougar Mellencamp